I See You… You Look Like a Prick

We are not afraid of changes here at the UCHG. We welcome the next generation consoles and games into our home, with their flash HDR lighting and super mega awesome exploding smoke effects. Couple this with the genius motion based controls of the Wii and we thought we had seen it all. Where would the games industry go next? A PlayStation controlled by your mind? Maybe a hyper sensitive Wii controlled by power glove esq controllers?… or none of these. Instead the games industry turned to the almighty and often pointless 3D!

Now we are not talking standard 3D graphics here, they have been around for a while, we are talking

Stereoscopic 3D!

3D glasses

What this does, providing you have a monitor capable of 120Hz, is turn most of your games into a fully immersive stereoscopic 3D gaming experience. The action will leap out of the screen and beat you about the face! It’s being billed as the next big thing in gaming and cinema destined to revolutionise the entertainment world as we know it… just like Blue-Ray.

The only downside to this wonderous savior of gaming is its tendency to make you look like a competitor in the special Olympics or a massive Ray Charles fan. None of these things are good. You may well be enjoying that 3D goodness but your mates will laugh at you and your girlfriend will suddenly realise how much of nerd you really are and subsequently leave you.

3dgaming

So call us overly fashion conscious but until Oakley get onboard and make some decent glasses we are going to stick with the original and best retro Stereoscopic 3D game. The Rubix Cube!

SEGA PAYNE 2

Faced with the death of the legendary, hard-hitting portable video game console, SEGA PAYNE 2 tells the story of a maverick cop determined to track down the cure for a brutal illness.

Hell-bent on discovering a remedy, his obsessive investigation takes him on a nightmare journey into a dark underworld. As the mystery deepens, Brad is forced to surrender all control and face the unthinkable possibility that…

It Might Be Over!

Lets Play Some Tetris Mother Fucker!

On the 21st of April 1989, in a place called Japan, something incredible happened. An event so biblical that it changed and helped shape the world we live in today…

The Nintendo Game Boy Was Released!

Game Boy

This little unassuming hand-held gaming device would see off strong competition from the Sega Game Gear and put down the Atari Lynx to become one of the best games consoles ever made.

The Game Boy has sold over 116 million units world-wide* and has been praised for appealing to people who enjoy gaming while sprawled out on the couch in their undies! It is also undoubtedly the finest machine to enjoy a game of Tetris on.

Game Boy Tetris

Tetris is available on almost all game consoles, phones and social networking sites but nothing can beat the sound and feel that the Game Boy can deliver.

So here is a UCHG top tip. Get home from work, get on your sofa, get in your pants and play some Tetris mother fucker.

*sales include game boy and game boy colour

Death by Menacer (T2 Arcade)

It’s a well known fact that Brad loves the Sega Menacer (here’s proof) – but if anything, it’s temperamental.

If T2 Arcade has more than two levels, we’re yet to see them – is this because Terminators are hard bastards to kill? Or that you can never tell if you’re actually being hit? Or that there’s so much shit to shoot but no health pickups?

No – this is mostly because by the time you’ve killed your first hundred Terminators, the batteries are dead.

Check out what happened when Brad had another stab at whooping some metal-ass bitches.